Friendships I would like

Sunday afternoon I decided to watch Sex And The City. It was a very old episode of course, back when Miranda found out she was pregnant for the first time. 

There was this particular scene where she saw Charlotte on the street after having fought with her due to their contradicting views towards pregnancy. Charlotte was crying and didn’t want to talk but despite her friend’s cold shoulder Miranda told her she’s going follow her home from afar just in case she changes her mind and needs to open up. 

Then it hit me. Thats the friendship I would like to have. Someone who will still be there for me when I am not the best person to be around. I have many days when I don’t even want to talk to anyone or hang out so I appear cold, rude, emotionless and distant, so I would appreciate having someone like that around for those days, aside from my family. 

What hits me harder is that I am actually a Miranda myself. Sometimes I wonder if my friends know that no matter what if they are in need of a shoulder or an ear I am just behind them. 

There is a friend who knows though. A friend who comes to tell me who they love and what they plan for the future after not having spoken in ages. First thing he says in two years is “You are not gonna believe what i found out”, “I have fallen in love”. Because he knows that I care. We are friends so I care to know. If he thinks he needs to share with someone then what friend would I be if I didn’t care? 

I am not saying I have been the best of friends or that I am the best of friends. Yes, I look like a hermit and refuse everything sometimes. Nothing amuses me. Everything annoys me. Everything is of little interest. Those days are not that rare, but it is for those days that I want a friend like that.

So when I turn my head, I’ll know and I’ll see their smile. 

For I am that friend. Despite everything I want them all to know I am that friend. 


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